Yesterday I wrote about how stepping on the scales to weigh yourself can be an opportunity to observe your thinking, and the feeling your thoughts create.
Today I would like to stick with focusing on thinking and look more closely at thoughts vs. facts or as I call them, circumstances.
Recognising the difference between ‘your thoughts about’ and ‘the facts of’ a situation is the very first step in mastering an improved level of self-awareness that will massively help you make changes in your life, whether that is lose weight, improve a relationship, or get a promotion at work.
Usually, when we identify a problem in our lives, such as weighing too much, or our husband being inconsiderate, we think of the problem as a circumstance. It seems and feels as though ‘being 30 lbs overweight or ‘husband letting us down because he didn’t do what he said’ is fact. But it isn’t. It’s ultimately a thought.
I am feeling plagued by overwhelm today.
Overwhelm is an emotion. I have quite a few thoughts that frequently generate the feeling of overwhelm in me.
For me it’s usually associated with thoughts about having too much to do and not enough time to get it done. These thoughts usually relate to other thoughts that I have about what I ‘should’ get done. I also think that I want to do everything because I tell myself things will be better, in fact ‘I will be better’ if I get everything done the way I want to.
Much of what I want to get done today (Sunday) is preparation for the week ahead. I am also telling myself that if I don’t get do everything I will be ‘behind’ before the week has even started.
So, what’s the problem with feeling overwhelmed? I used to think that feelings of overwhelm, stress or urgency were what drove me to get everything done but now I know that overwhelm doesn’t serve...
Chances are that if you have been struggling to lose weight for a while you are familiar with experiencing an array of emotions when you get on the scales. I can remember the anticipation of a slimming club weigh in. In fact, I would only go when I lost weight because I felt such shame if I had gained a pound.
We make it mean such a big deal as to whether the number has gone up or down. It’s worth remembering it’s only a number. The number itself has no meaning. It’s our thoughts about the number that make it mean something. The evidence for this is that the same number will mean different things to different people.
Consider the number, 13 stone and 5 lbs. What does that number mean to you? What thought do you have about that number? How does that thought make your feel?
Here are the some of the thoughts that you may have had:
There are as many ‘right diets’ as there are people on the planet. The right diet for me will not be the right diet for you. What’s right for you will depend on your life stage, genetics, life-style and much more.
I work closely with my clients to determine what is the right diet for them. It is a learning process, and that ‘right diet’ will for sure change in the time that we work together. I also believe that the diet plan we create for them should be one that they would be willing to stick to for life. And we spend time analysing what that means and how they want to think and feel about that.
I work closely with my clients to explore what might be the right diet for them. It is a learning process. And that ‘right diet’ will for sure change in the time that we work together.
I enourage them to consider that the diet plan we create for them should be something they would be willing to stick to for life. We also spend time...
It is so easy to overeat in the world that we live in. Our culture, psychology and neurobiology all play a part and have contributed to the simple fact that overeating is ‘normal’.
It’s normal to eat cake when someone brings it into the office because it is their birthday. Even though your body has no fuel or nutritional requirement for the cake, and even though eating cake regularly leads to being overweight and increasing chance of health problems, it’s the person who declines the slice of cake that stands out. Isn’t that crazy!
And of course, the problem with overeating is that the more we overeat the more weight we gain and the greater the decline of our mental and physical health.
In 2016 The World Health Organization reported that more than 1.9 billion adults (39%) were overweight, of which 650 million (13%) were obese.
Being overweight is a major risk factor in:
My mentor and coach, Brooke Castillo, teaches the concept of massive action.
One example of massive action that she suggested to one of her clients who was single and wanted to be married, is that they should commit to going on 200 first dates. By committing to such massive action, they would be hugely increasing their chances of meeting their future husband, and they would certainly perfect the art of dating (if there is such a thing), and they would have a lot of life experiences during the process.
I love this example because it illustrates so clearly that by taking massive action, we are hugely increasing our opportunities to practice and learn and hence our chance of success.
Some of them will be my clients, some of them will take value from the free coaching sessions that I offer, and others may simply read one of my blog posts and pick up something useful that they can apply in their own life....
Most people want to try to lose weight and most people are pretty good at trying to do it. But most people are not committed enough.
If you want to lose weight think carefully. Are you willing to try or are you committed? Are you determined to do it no matter what?
Notice that if the word try is in the statement or the declaration, it’s indicating that quitting is an option.
Most people are very good at quitting. We are very good at trying and quitting. We are not very good at committing. Now, the way that I define committing is that you will continue to take massive action until you get the result you want. Quitting is not an option. You will keep at it for as long as you need to. You will adjust in order to reach your goal. You will not quit. You will not give up.
How much are you willing to commit to losing weight no matter what? Would you be willing to give me your car if you don’t lose weight? Why not? If you’re committed, you would...
If your child, or close family member, had been kidnapped, and was to be held captive until you reached your goal weight, what would your weight loss journey look like? I’m guessing if it were plotted on paper the graph tracking daily weigh ins would be a consistent decline without much fluctuation. Your reason to lose weight would be so compelling that you wouldn’t even consider whether you should have those biscuits with your morning coffee.
Now I know this is an extreme and unrealistic example, but if you allow yourself to consider it, it demonstrates how easy it could be to lose weight consistently, because you are extremely clear and focused, if you reason is highly compelling.
Now consider, still using the above example, what would your desire, belief, resilience and commitment look like? They would all be extremely high. Your desire, commitment, and resilience to losing would weight would be at 100%, nothing else would matter, and your belief – well that...
Do you ever get frustrated with yourself because you really want something, but you don’t take the required action to get it, even if it’s something that you really, really want?
Often, we have dreams and ideas and things that we want to do, and no matter how much we try, we just can’t get ourselves motivated to follow through and achieve what we truly desire.
Have you ever wondered why? I used to wonder why I couldn’t stick to a diet. I used to wonder why I couldn’t focus on getting my house organised and looking the way that I really wanted it. And, the reason, which I shall get to in just a moment, all comes down to the same thing which is great because when you’ve learned the skills in one area of your life you can apply them in all areas.
And the skills that you need to learn are based on the main tool that I teach my clients and it is called THE MODEL. THE MODEL was created by my coach Brooke Castillo of The Life Coach...
Do you constantly think there aren’t enough hours in the day and that you are busy?
This week’s blog post looks at productivity and considers:
I am learning how to increase my productivity. Every week I practise seeing if I can get more done than I did the week before. It’s a bit of an obsession of mine. I’m one of those people who used to totally believe that there aren’t enough hours in the day and that I was ‘just too busy’. I now know that those beliefs, not only aren’t true, but that they also don’t serve me, and I am learning to let them go whilst I work hard to get more done.
If you’re like me and you like getting stuff done, if you like the...